Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Premature Baby tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Great christmas!

I hope everyone had a GREAT christmas!! We sure did! It was amazing to have our little girl free of cords and wires! She is one spoiled little girl!! She has a mound of toys!! We layed her in her boppie the other night and took a picture of her with all her toys around her! My goodness!! If she only knew!!! She got this catepiller and if you touch his feet he either plays noises or music. Brielle caught on right away!! It was so funny! She was banging her hands down on is feet and watching the lights go! Amazing! She got her first 2 dolls from Grandma Cindy. Diapers, Vtech books, a ball game that shoots balls into the air, an activity table, clothes, blankets, her first fishing pole (thanks uncle Chase!), baby food, wipes, cereal, and numerous ornament! The list goes on and on!! Ayden was also blessed with quite a few gifts this year! He got alot of ornaments and a helicopter that is floated with a magnet, & a cherub that can sit in his memory cubby. We werent expecting anything for the little angel but it was well appreciated! Never forgotten!

Brielle is changing everyday! Its amazing to watch! Today for instance, she realized she had toes! She was sitting on my lap and all of the sudden looked down and was staring at her bare tootsies! I brought her hand to her toes and she was wiggling them and kept grabbing them. It was adorable! Her smiles are still endless and she is getting more babbly and giggly! She definately lets you know when she is NOT happy! Dont take that bottle out of her mouth or move her if shes content! (uh uhm dadddy). She screams bloody murder!! For heaven sakes! She doesnt do well being moved if she is sleeping. She will fall asleep on me and when we put her in her swing shes awake! But she goes to bed very well in her bassinett! She loves that bassinett! Thanks Great Aunt Nancy! Christmas day she was sooooo mad! Screaming and crying! We took off her jammies cuz she worked herself up so much she was hot, that worked for 2 minutes. I tried to settle her, dad tried, nothing! I finally said bring her up and put her in bed. It was only 6:45 but she was over tired and she zonked out! We took a nap this afternoon and I was sleeping on the couch and she was on the other couch and I woke up to her with her feet up on top of her wet wipe container kicking away and cooing and gigglying! No crying to say she was awake she thought she would just play til mom woke up. My baby is growing up! She isnt even that cuddly anymore since she realized she would rather sit and stand than lay! I guess it was gonna happen but come on your only 7 months girlfriend! She follows us around the room until she cant nomore! She knows who we are and where we are going and she loves to sit and watch TV with us.

Brielle has now been discharged from her at home nurses!! Her main nurse says she is looking wonderful and gaining weight well! (up to over 12lbs already!) We had to do her sleep test last night. We just put the oxy probe on her foot to read her oxygen and now the pulmonalogist in Milwaukee will read it and let us know if she needs oxygen at night. Its been a week and a half already so Im hoping she wont! We will See!

I LOVE LOVE LOVE watching Brielle and Josh interact. I have the best husband and Brielle has the best father! He is always making her laugh and smile and he is so good with her! Hes not hesitant at all to tell me to go back to bed during the late night feeding while he handles it. He loves to give her her baths. And boy o boy you should hear those two! Making duck sounds and giggling its so freaking adorable! My heart just melts! I always knew he would make a great dad watching him with the 3 nephews but its a whole new level now when its your own!

Brielle has her hernia surgery scheduled for Feb. 9th at 7:30am. She cant eat after midnight. Ya okay! Try telling her that! How on earth do you make a 7 month old not eat for almost 8 hours??????????? I will be waking her at 11:45 to eat and try to get 4 oz in her. Im sooooo not looking forward to that day!!!!!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

We are Cordless!

You read correct! Monday night we got a call from Childrens Hospital Milwaukee after I called Dr Kranik (pediatrician) telling him Brielle was off oxygen for 3 days now, Now what?? So he wanted us to go to Milwaukee to see a pulmonalogist. Well we didnt think it would be so soon, but they wanted us in Milwaukee (2 hours away) at 7:50 a.m. So I took off work and away we went! The doctor was MORE than pleased with her! She said she is a model 24 weeker! She is doing exactly what they would like to see! SO She said that we can stop using the oxygen and her monitor! We will do "spot checks" on her thru out the day and we will keep it until she is 1 years old. The purpose of keeping the oxygen and monitor is in case she gets sick Oxygen will be her best friend and help her thru the cold! I am MORE than comfortable with that! Better safe than sorry! Brielle will have a sleep study so to speak done to make sure that when she is sleeping she is being well oxygenated. That will probably be done tomorrow night. It is the same monitor she is wearing right" now but this one has a recorder in it and will be downloaded to the Milwaukee Dr for her to read the results. She doesnt have alarms at night so I am sure that she wont need oxygen at night! She did VERY good at the Dr today! We first had to do a chest xray and they put her in this like high chair seat and then they velcroed her arms up above her head and then her whole chest was velcroed to the back of the chair so she couldnt move. She did AMAZING! The 3 girls taking the xray just loved her (as everyone usually does) and said how well she was doing! She never cried until mommy tried to dress her. Go figure!! She had to have a blood gas drawn after we seen the pulmonalogist and she didnt even cry when she got her heal poked! She was a saint!! Even in the car!!

I have never known what a "term" baby feels like. Therefore, all the cords were normal and just a part of my day. Today felt alittle weird! I still find myself searching for the cord making sure its not pinched in her carseat base, or lifting her higher than normal so I didnt pull her monitor off her foot. Or this morning I changed her diaper and I was going to leave her there because I forgot I can take her with me room to room now. I can just dress her without having to put her monitor cord thru one of her pants legs and put a onesie on her from her legs up instead of over her head due to her oxygen. It is going to take me alittle while to get used to this new child of mine! But I have to say, it hasnt even been a full day and IM LOVING IT!!!

Brielle is getting big before my eyes! She is starting to rub her eyes when shes tired. She is mocking our sounds (like EHHS) She is having little giggles. All smiles! She is cool with being put in her bassinett to fall asleep instead of being rocked to sleep :( Sadest of all! She follows as we leave the room or dangle toys in front of her. Shes just all around growing up! Its amazing! I truly can say that I am blessed with one amazing miracle baby!! The more I hear it from doctors and therapists who have seen it all, the more I "Get it". Ive always known she is a miracle but I havent understood the great things that she is exceeding that even older gestation babies dont do.

I am pleased to have my xmas wish come true! I said I wanted a cordless baby for xmas and I GOT IT! My little angel is definately kicking his sister in the heiny!

Saturday, December 18, 2010


I ran across this NICU christmas poem and thought I'd share.....

Jolly Old St. Nicu

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and in each isolette
Little creatures were squirming and getting all set;
Machinery sat by their bedsides with care,
In hopes that good breathing skills soon would be there.

Day shifters were home all snug in their beds,
As visions of overtime danced in their heads;
While preemies on ventilators, and some on CPAP,
Had just settled down for a long winter’s nap…

When out in the hall there arose such a clatter,
The residents woke up to see what was the matter.
Away from the sink I flew like a jet
To make sure all was well at my baby’s isolette.

Some bilirubin lights with their powerful glow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to babies below,
When, there before my wondering eyes, it would seem,
Was an oversized stroller and a medical team.
With a handful of needles with which they could stick you,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nicu.

More rapid than eagles his specialists came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:
“Now, Nurses! Now, Residents! Now, Neonatologists!
On, Social Workers! On, Respiratory and Occupational Therapists!
From the front of the unit! To the end of the hall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!”

Up to each baby’s cribside they flew,
With the stroller full of toys, and St. Nicu too.
And then, in a twinkling, they stopped at each bed
And tucked in the babies and got them all fed.

As I looked at my baby, and was turning around,
Down our aisle St. Nicu came with a bound.
He was dressed in red scrubs, and I could instantly tell
That his clothes had an obvious hospital smell;
A bag of stuffed animals was flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.
A little red pen he held tight in his teeth,
And a stethoscope encircled his neck like a wreath.

He was chubby and plump, with a few extra pounds,
And I laughed when I saw him there doing his rounds.
A turn of his clipboard and a twist of his head
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;
He spoke few words, but came straight to my side,
And running down his face was a tear he had cried.

And laying his hand on the back of my head,
He gave me a nod, and slowly he said:
“Each night you come here you’re aware of the danger,
But your baby is loved by the One in the manger.”

Then the medical team gave a thumbs-up and smiled
And St. Nicu placed an animal next to my child.
But I heard him exclaim, as they rolled out of sight,
“Merry Christmas, tiny baby, and have a wonderful night!”

24 HOURS & counting!

24 hours. 1 whole day. 1440 Minutes. 86,400 Seconds. YUP thats how long Brielle was OFF her OXYGEN!!!!! Its been exactly that plus 11 minutes. Im sooo excited I couldnt wait to post!! BUT Im hoping I dont jinx her!! I was alittle stand offish last night to not turn her back on while we went to bed, so we turned up her alarm settings so that when she hit 85 she would alarm us instead of her normal 79. She didnt have any alarms!! I woke up for work at 5am and ran to the oxygen tank thinking Josh turned her back on since her sats were 98! NOPE a big ZERO on the tank setting!!!!! I was so excited! We are house bound and Im actually okay with it. After she got sick the last time and we seen how much it affected her oxygen needs, it forces us to stay home that much more! Xmas will be tough since we love to go to all the houses we are invited to, but its about Brielle. And she cant get sick!! Period!

I was talking with a my bestie today as a customer walked by hacking her lungs up! She said "UGH go home! I dont want what you have!!" I said "EXACTLY!" I have to shelter my preemie and not go anywhere because everyone else is inconsiderate by going out when they are sick. But yet we are punished! We are the ones that have to stay home and cant go anywhere for fear of "Germs" It makes everyday life that much harder! I cant just run to Walmart quick for a gallon of milk for fear of...Yup you guessed it...SICK PEOPLE! And what is it about people coughing and not covering their mouths? Or Sneezing and not covering their nose?? And the worst part of it, I go somewhere and then come home to my preemie that cant leave her bubble and I could still be carrying the "GERMS" They are everywhere!!!!!!! OKay Vent OVER! hehe

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Cordless....Soon Enough!

Well its once again been a pretty boring week! The at home nurse was here again today!! Brielle is now up to 11 lbs 5oz! She is gaining weight well! And the weird part of it is, she is 6 months (3 months adjusted) and still only taking 3oz a feeding. But I spoke with Dr. Kranik about my concerns and he said that she is gaining right where she should so its no concern to him. So I say OK. We are slowly trying to get her off the O2. The cold she has in November set us back. Im not in any huge hurry to get her weaned off, but I am. I am ready to have that cordless baby!! When I pick up my neice, Johanna, it is so weird to me that I can just walk and not worry about tripping over cords, and I can go freely from room to room. Someday! Someday.....

Tomorrow Brielle goes in for her 2nd RSV shot. She DOES NOT like this one for some reason! She cries harder with this one shot than she did with the 4 shots. I made it for 5:15 so daddy can be there. Mama is a wimp! There I said it!

The smiles at this house are ENDLESS!! And I more than love it!! I do not mind 2am feedings when I get that huge smile from her! She is starting to giggle and coo. Its adorable!! Yesterday the dogs were about to be put up for sale. Scratch that..FREE! I yelled at them to be quiet and I was holding Brielle standing on my legs. I looked back at her as she was locked on my eyes and said "AHHHHHH THEY ARE DRIVING ME CRAZZZZYYYY!!" And she gave me the biggest smile and coo and giggle!!! I couldnt help but laugh and everything seemed alright! She truly is the joy in my life!!! I often wonder what I did with my time now before she was here! Daddy says hes ready for #2. I say HES CRAZY!! Im content right now with my little girl!! Shes growing up so fast Im afraid if I turn my back I will miss something!!

Monday, December 6, 2010

6 month shots

Brielle had her 6 month check up today. 2 shots in each leg! Poor baby! She did surprisingly well!!!! Daddy took off to go with me since her 4 month shots were NO fun! But on the way there, my tire ended up coming off the rim. SO I had to call my mom and have her come get us and lend me her car while Josh ran home literally to get his truck and go back to fix my tire. UGH I tell ya!! Love Mondays!!! Anywho....Dr. Kraink is very pleased with her!!! She handled her cold very well! And is recovering well!!! She is 10lbs 14oz and 21.5" long. She is 40% for weight 5% height and 10% head circm. He said she is creating her own curve but its staying at a steady curve so he is pleased!!

We were at the mall Friday finishing up some shopping and sat down in cafe court to eat dinner. A lady came up to us asking "Is this Brielle?" I said "Yes" thinking I dont recognize her. She explained that her mom, Peggi, worked with Josh and she had been following our blog since before Brielle was born and she recognized me in the pictures from the blog and then seen Brielle. So Shanna and her family sat down and had dinner with us! It was SO nice to meet a face that has been following our blog and being a part of our "Family." There are so many kind people that we have not met that follow our journey. This is one reason I have made the decison to continue the blog. Since I havent met alot of the people I cant keep everyone updated on whats happening. I wish I could meet alot of people I have met thru this journey. I cant express our thanks to everyone we know and dont know that have prayed, cried, laughed, and smiled with our family!! Never in my wildest dreams did I expect our life to take this crazy turn!! I never thought I'd be sitting here writing about my life!! Now its kinda addicting hehe.

We had Brielles birth to 3 xmas party on Saturday! It was fun!!! Here is a picture with santa and her!

Thursday, December 2, 2010

6 Months old & 3 Months at home!

So Brielle is 6 months old (well Yesterday). Adjusted age of 2months 1week 5days. hehe. Hows that for exact?? (By the way the top of my blog tells ya her age! Im not bored!!) Anywho.....She weighed in at 10lbs 14oz!! Monday she goes for her 6 month shots :( & we will find out her height. Its hard to believe its been 6 months already! I think with everything going on (3 months in the NICU, 3 months home) it just flew by!!! Its hard to believe that xmas is right around the corner!! I feel like this year just passed us by!! We basically spent spring, summer, and some of fall in the hospital. And now we are pretty much housebound again til April til flu and cold season is over. O The life of a preemie! But we wouldnt change a thing! We love our little girl with all our hearts! She is our miracle, sweetie pie, pumpkin, little stinker, little fighter, beautiful girl that lights up our life!

Brielle is ALL SMILES! Its soooooooooooo great to talk to her and have her respond with a smile!!! A dream come true!! When she first came home, I told her she can just smile and stay that small! Well now that she smiled, I told her she can just sit and then HAULT! But Im sure when that happens it will be, just crawl then stay! Then walk then stop growing! etc etc

We had Birth to 3 come to the house today. All 3 girls were VERY pleased with her progress!! Her ankles and legs have loosened up! They dont see any signs of cerebral palsy!!!! We still have one more month til its "officially" when the signs show up but the physical therapist said she doesnt see any signs she would be worried about!! She said the brain is an amazing thing!!! They put her on her tummy and she held herself up great using her arms and then they took a toy and had her follow it around to her sides and she did! And she didnt tip over!! They said thats what a 4 month old should be doing! So she is considered to be a 10 week old so she is above where she should be! Same with the fact that she loves to stand and she will collapse and bring herself back up. Her ability to control her head! To gaze and look at people when they talk to her! They were very impressed! I was too! I was on cloud 9 when they left! Its always nice to hear from a therapist that your child is defeating all odds! She has definately proven everyone wrong! It was so hard 6 months ago to know what Brielles future would be like! I think she is paving the way and showing us that she is going to be the miracle 24 weeker that she has destined to be since day 1! Mommy and daddy are soooo proud of you!! And I know Ayden is too!! Everynight when I see the bright star in the sky, I know thats Ayden smiling down saying "Go little sister Go!!!"

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Alot of Thanks

Well Brielle has got some wheezing going on. May have been a cold starting that we caught! So she is on Albuterol breathing treatments 4x a day. She is not too fond of them!! She gets all jittery and hyper when she is on them! But it helps her! My cousin, Angie, is going to medical school and whipped out her "Ears" so I had her listen to Brielle and she said she sounded good! So they must be helping! Alittle reasurance for me as well!!

Today is Thanksgiving! We have ALOT to be thankful for!!! I am Thankful for my miracle daughter! She has come such a long way! We are so proud of her and so happy she is doing so well and home! Everyday she has changes and its so fun to see them! Everytime my mom sees her she notices the changes. Ex. She is sitting longer, or her eyes have changed colors, or she smiles more. Its fun to watch! Im just in awe! 6 months ago we didnt know what would come out of our situation! Now we are so thankful it ended how it did!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Mamas weakness

Well Brielle has figured out mamas weakness........Her fat lip! She gives me that fat lip with this whimpery cry and I break out in tears. How sad is that???????? I just cant take it that she is that sad :( Shes doing it right now :(

I dont know why that gets me everytime but it does!!!

On another note....She was off her oxygen again for 11 hours today! Go baby go! We have had her nose cannula out of her nose completely while she if off. I think she LOVES it! She is getting fussy now when we put it back in. Sadly, she didnt know any different before we took it out. To her that was normal. But she is slowly learning there may be a new "normal!"

Friday, November 19, 2010

Off Day!

Today was an Off OXYGEN day for Brielle!!!! Daddy took her off at 7:30am after mommy went to work and she went back on at 6:15pm. So 10 hours 45 min she lasted off it!! She had awesome numbers the whole time!!! VERY VERY VERY proud of our little peanut!!! Dr Kranik said we have to take her off and just watch number, so thats what we shall do! And BAM she made it WELL over what we thought she would this early in the game!! I thought for sure she would be on it til maybe a year old. We shall see....In the words of nurse Kathy "Shes the Boss!!"

This christmas is very exciting for us because we have Brielle!! First christmas as parents!! It is SOOO hard to not buy Targets toy section!! We went from just getting her this pretty cool crawl along snail that is also 2 other toys for her to now we bought her this glow seahorse that lights up and plays 5 lullabies. She is mesmorized by it! As you can te,ll Santa came early for this little one :)

I have been reading books and singing to her before bed time when I put her to bed. I made up my own quarky twinkle twinkle song and own lyrics. It goes like this:

Twinkle Twinkle Little Ayden
How I wonder where you are
Watching over me in the sky
Like a diamond in my eye
Twinkle Twinkle Little Ayden....

She just stares into my eyes while I sing it Over and over and over and over hehehe.

My little nephew, Anthony, is the sweetest thing! That one night at the campfire, when I told him the star was Ayden, he hasnt forgotten. Its adorable!! He will ask me where Ayden is or he will tell me he talked to him last night, they roasted marshmallows together one night, he searches for him all the time! The other night he went outside to say goodnight to Ayden as he does on a regular basis and he said to my sister, "Ayden is covered by blankets" It was cloudy so he couldnt see him! It just melts my heart that our little boy isnt forgotten even by our 4 year old nephew! And we wont let Brielle forget either!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Prematurity Awareness Day

Ive been wanting to blog more, but our days have been pretty low key and boring to say the least! But I'm not complaining!!!

Nov. 7 8:30am I was at work and got a phone call from Josh, with Brielle screaming. He said the dreaded words "I think her hernia popped again." "O no" was my reply. I called the Pediatrician Dr. Kranik and his nurse Karla, my fav, was on call with him that Sunday and she called him and called me back to say the other dreaded words "Head to the ER" SO I rushed home to get my precious girl and we headed to the ER. I was freaking out since the last time was so horrible getting it back in! I was glad Josh was with me this time, but I was afraid that they might not be able to get this one back in and then it would be emergency surgery. But the opposite happened! I was not comfortable with the ER doctor trying to push it back in. I was under the impression that the surgeon was being paged to come put it in. WRONG! So the ER doctor sat down on the bed next to her, undid her diaper and proceeded to push it back in and Brielles poor face went pitch red and the screams came to life! I felt sooooo bad!! But in about a minute it was over!!! A huge relief!!!! He said that because it was caught so early this time, instead of 4 days like last time, that the swelling wasnt so intense and it could be easily pushed back in! Way to go dad for noticing!!

Birth to 3 came last Thursday! I was alittle nervous! She has been having her hands in a fist alot! But I asked and the physical therapist looked at it and said she does relax them and she should grow out of it! YAY! They didnt see any signs of cerebral palsy YET and will be back in December! They were very pleased with her and how she is doing! Arent we all!!!

Yesterday the at home nurse was here. I offically have a 10 lb 2.5oz turkey on my hands!!!! And she thinks she may be starting to teethe! Like seriously!! Shes only 2 months!!! She chews on her hands constantly! She drools constantly! She has red cheeks and she had a low grade temp of 98.8 yesterday. And she keeps pushing her tongue on her bottom gum which is why she said MAYBE its a possibility! Sad but happy day yesterday for me! Sad because my baby is growing so fast before my eyes!! It feels like yesterday my precious babies were born, the size of a 20oz mountain dew bottle! Feels like yesterday we were saying good bye to our precious baby boy! Like I was getting ready to head to the NICU for my daily routine of caring for my little miracle baby! And now she is home, growing, holding her head up, 10POUNDS!, and possibly teething! Like seriously! When did this all happen!! When I was telling Josh yesterday he said "She will be walking soon" I got teary eyed. I know its great the my soda bottle has grown into a turkey now but I just dont know where the time has gone! O well suck it up and grow baby grow! I need to get it together and visit the NICU soon so we can see our favorite nurses and doctors that made this all possible!!

Last Friday Josh had Brielle off oxygen for 5 hours!!!!! Brielle met mama at the back door when I got home from work!!! Usually she is confined to our living room and our bedroom so to meet me in the kitchen was pretty neat! Then I had to run upstairs to get something and I got to take her with me!! We had alittle talk about how great it is to be able to go all over the house with mama so hopefully she will take it into consideration and loose the oxygen soon here! Shes been off today for an hour and 20 mintues so far and still doing good. So we just have to get her in the habit of being off little by little!

Brielle has also started to give real smiles! She loves when we kiss and blow on the side of her cheeks. That gets the most smiles out of her! Its so cute! The nurse yesterday knelt down by her swing and said "By precious girl" and Brielle gave her a big smile!! Julie said that made her day and mom and dad are 2 lucky people!! YES WE ARE! She doesnt like her daddy AT ALL hehe! He can get alot of smiles out of her when he gets home from work! Its adorable! I must say she has a GREAT daddy! He loves her more than words can say! It melts my heart to see those two interact!

Today is Prematurity Awareness Day. A few comments moms of preemies have made that are SO true and made me think: "While Pregnant moms cant wait to show their babies off to the world. Preemie moms have to hibernate and shelter their babies from the world due to illnesses that can be deadly!"
This is so true! We are So proud of Brielle and want to show her off to the world and instead we have to shelter her! Its sad but its life! We DO NOT want her to end up back in the hospital due to something that can be prevented! So this year Thanksgiving and Xmas will be sheltered in our family! We just cant have her getting sick! So far everyone has been VERY understanding! But one thing the NICU has taught me in the 3 months is to be an advocate for our daughter! So thats what we are doing! We have to put our foot down and not bring our preemie around ill people and environments! If she was to get sick it could be deadly! her lungs are VERY fragile still, hence the oxygen need. Any sickness could cause her to remain on oxygen or worse! Hopefully everyone continues to be supportive and understanding thru this holiday season! As sad as it is for us, since we LOVE to be with family and friends, its just what it has to be!

Friday, November 5, 2010

5 months

Brielle was 5 months on November 1st. Cant believe it!! We had her 5 month check up today. Josh and I had a bet on what she weighed and her length and Josh was right on them both (Dont tell him I used the "R" word with his name) She weighs 9lbs 10oz and is 20" long!! So on the growth chart she is in the 50% for weight, 5% for length (so she is a shorty) and 25% for head circ. All and all he is VERY pleased with her!! He heard of this clinic in Green Bay for babys on oxygen and would like to find out more and send us there if he thinks we would benefit from it. He wants to give us a better explanation as to When we will pull the plug on the oxygen other than the answer "When she is ready" that he gives us all the time. He was originally wanting us to talk to a pulmonologist in Milwaukee but he said we should try Green Bay first since Milwaukee is a drive and an all day affair. So we said we would try it out!!

Brielle was given the OK to stop using the apnea/brady monitor on Thursday!!! So we glady returned that machine! No more smoke detector alarm to spring us out of bed! She hasnt had an episode in a month!! Glad she got off the caffeine and is doing well enough to get off one monitor!! Oxygen and pulse ox monitor will be next!!

Nothing else new to report other than the call of motherly duty is crying out and not digging her swing anymore! Ta ta for now!

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

New cousins

Lots going on this week and its only Wednesday!!! My sister had her baby girl today!! Johanna Marie was born Oct 27 at 11:02am 5lbs 5oz and 18.5" long! My cousin had her baby yesterday at 12:28pm 5lbs 7oz 18" long! Lots of babies this year!! Its my grandma joans 10th great grandchild! She had 3 grand children born in 1984 and 3 greats born in 2010 now!

Nurse Kathy came to visit from the NICU! We had a WONDERFUL visit and I believe Brielle remembered her voice. She just looked up at her when she was talking. It was sweet to see her again!! I dont miss going to the NICU every day three times a day but I DO miss the nurses and friends you meet!! I keep in touch with quite a few of them which is nice!!

I wrote an article for http://www.preemiebabies101.com/ambers-story/ and late last week www.growingyourbaby.com contacted me to write them "a short story" So I completed that Monday and sent it. I'm not sure when exactly it will be posted! I never thought I loved writing until I started this blog! Maybe cuz its just something thats dear to my heart and I dont have to think about it, it just comes to me :)

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Cry Fest

Monday Brielle was EXTREMELY fussy and would only sleep very little and cry when she wouldnt sleep. I tried to give her anti gas drops thinking it was gas, tried to help her poo, took her temperature like crazy, checked her ears, everything I could think of and it just wouldnt stop. Wednesday I said enough and called the Dr. even though I knew Dr. kranik was off. They called him finding it odd as well she wouldnt stop crying and he had me come in and see one of the nurse practitioners and gave her some ideas such as baby heartburn. They ruled that out and still couldnt figure out what it was. They thought that maybe she was getting too much caffeine since they just got the download results and it showed that she hasnt had ANY brady or apneas in the last 2 weeks so we were able to stop her caffeine!!!! They sent us home and scheduled us an appt for Thursday morning if she was still fussy. We got home and she settled down in her swing for about an hour wide awake and HAPPY! It was a miracle that didnt last long! She was up ALL night Wednesday night. Josh and I took shifts sleeping and trying to soothe our little girl. Our hearts broke that nothing would work! I couldnt wait for 9am to roll around to get her to Dr. Kranik!! I get there after she cried in the car the whole way there, take her out and she is HAPPY! Talk about calling mom a liar! Dr. Kranik asked some questions and then quickly went to examine her. He listened to her, checked her ears, and then took her diaper down and felt her groin. Immediately she turned bright red and started to scream and cry like she was for the past 4 days. I told him this is how she has been. He asked me if anyone has told me (from the NICU) that she had a hernia in her groin. I said "NO?" He said yes and its fairly large. He stepped out and came back and asked me to take her to Theda Clark right away to see a surgeon. I cancelled my birth to 3 program that was in 30 min and went to Theda Clark. The surgeon was waiting for us. He took her diaper down and said that she had a walnut sized hernia in the right part of her groin. He said he was going to push it back in. I was like WHAT! Can you even do that??????? Dr. Kranik said that they wouldnt do surgery til she was 6 months and off oxygen, and nothing was mentioned about pushing it back in. I didnt know what to expect. I went alone thinking he was just looking at her. WRONG! She screamed and cried for the whole 15 minutes it took to get it back in. She was crying so hard that she pushed it back out on him when he almost had it in. Any type of heavy crying or pushing (constipation) will push it back out. He said to me, I will try one more time and if I cant get it to pop we will need to go straight down to surgery. WHAT? SURGERY? This wasnt the original plan. I guess I shouldnt EVER expect the originial plan with Brielle! She thinks its fun to do things Brielles way! Finally the words I was waiting sweating for, IT POPPED! I asked him again in case I heard him wrong and he said IT POPPED! He held it in place for about 3 minutes until she calmed down. He was very sensitive and was rubbing her leg trying to soothe her with me. He told me she will eventually need surgery but he would like her to be 6 months old (December) and off oxygen atleast 3-4 weeks. It is a 20 minute procedure and she will more than likely come home with us that day unless she shows any baby sat signs. Then she will be admitted just over night to be watched.

So all the pain finally made sense!! If we bumped it, it would hurt, causing her to cry which caused it to pop out which caused even more pain. A baby doesnt understand to be calm and it wont be so bad. Everytime she would try to poo it would pop and hurt again. I felt so bad that I missed such a big lump like that on her groin. But like the Dr. said, she was soooo crabbby when we changed her because it hurt that we were just focused on getting the job done and calming her down. And never in our wildest dreams did I think to look for that!!

Brielle is also down to 1/32 on her oxygen which is the lowest setting so I asked the Dr. whats next. He gave us the OK to take it off thru out the day. BUT she cant sat down below 93. I've tried 3 times today but she didnt last very long. Baby steps! But atleast its a start!!! On our way to a cordless baby!!! In 2 more weeks they will come do another download of her apnea monitor and if she hasnt had any she will be cleared from that monitor!!! YAY!

She has been really watching objects lately! We have a video online that she watches all the time! When shes fussy I will play it and she settles and locks her eyes on it. She watches the ceiling fan. She watched a glow stick I had last night go back to back. Its pretty neat to see her starting to really act like a one month old now!! She weighs 8lbs 9oz!

Monday, October 18, 2010

Priceless moments!!

This last week has been pretty uneventful. Which is always a good thing in the world of a preemie!!! She is slowly getting down on her oxygen!!! SCORE!! She has just graduated down to 1/32 liter! Which is the lowest setting on her oxygen tank!! I was at her new second home today again (Dr. Kraniks office) for a caffeine level check and mentioned that she was on the last setting on her oxygen and the nurse said when we think she is ready to wean OFF to call and set up that appointment. But to be able to do that she should be sating around 99-100 pretty much all day. So right now she is sleeping and she is sating 95. I'm not really sure when it all happened!!!! Last I knew she was at 1/8!!! Dr. Kranik called it!! He said she would start gaining weight and start to suck down her bottles and then wean off the oxygen and apnea monitor and hopefully her caffeine!! Shes been starting to suck down her bottles faster than normal! Wednesday we had to reload her caffeine again. Her levels were too low from the last "load". So now she is up to 1.4ml of caffeine a day! We are going to buy stock in starbucks!!

We went on Sunday to Waupaca to take family pictures!! We did them ourselves with the help of Joshs mom. I think they turned out great!!! I am more than excited!! I will post a few!!! Brielle did a good job!! We were there a few hours and alot of different scenerys and she did awesome!!! We even had the furbabies and they did okay too! Not bad for a last minute idea and throwing it together!!! Priceless moments we will always have now!!

Friday was National baby loss awareness day. So we got 3 balloons for Ayden from me, daddy, and Brielle. We got blue, white and pink for the baby loss pin colors we have. We let them go and they at first went towards one single star in the sky then they turned and went behind us. They went towards 3 stars!!!! The 3 stars to me I instantly thought of Carlos, Collin, and Ayden. All his friends from the NICU that had passed right around the same time as Ayden. They were waiting for their special balloons!! It definately brought a tear to my eye. My dad and Mary and my grandma were with us when we did it. We all just stood there and watched until we couldnt see them anymore in the night sky! Priceless!! We will never forget our little man. Brielle will never forget her hero and her brother As I talk to other parents that have lost a little one they are the same way. One nurse gets her daughter a little xmas tree every year. So we all have our little ways I guess to keep them alive. We got Ayden his own pumpkin. I put wings on it for him. We had it in alot of Brielles pictures! Gone, but never forgotten!

Monday, October 11, 2010

We picked the best pumpkin!

Well not much has changed in the last week! Which is of course always a good thing in our lives! We did have her apnea/brady monitor downloaded Wednesday and she was having too many apnea episodes so the Dr. called us back in on Thursday for a caffeine level check and on Friday decided they needed to reload her on caffeine. So that night at 4pm we had to give her 1.5ml and then 6 hours later another 1.5ml and then daily now she gets 1.1ml. Up from her .9ml she was getting. She SHOULD have outgrown her caffeine being full term now, but she hasnt. Still our goal to get her off of the caffeine but as Brielle has shown us all in her 4 months 1 week 3 days life, is that she does stuff as she darn well pleases! Once again, "Shes the Boss." As scary as that is! That is the truth! So we just sit back and enjoy the ride for now. I can definately tell the difference tho now that she is on the higher caffeine. She is not as buzzy! Her monitors are definately quieter!

This week we go back in tomorrow for another caffeine level to make sure it theraputic. Thursday Birth to 3 is coming to the house. Early intervention and Physical Therapy are coming this time around to evaulate her. They will keep an eye on her over the next few months and make sure she is developing properly with her motor skills etc and also teaching us some excersies to do with her. They will be watching for signs of cerebral palsy as well since her risk of having it is higher.

My almost 4 year old nephew was over this morning early! And he wanted to look out my window and say "Hi" to Ayden. AWE melted my heart!!! We didnt even say anything to bring it up! My sister said he says Hi to Ayden all the time. He roasted marshmallows the other day with him. All stems back from that one night we were having a fire and I seen the one star in the sky and told him it was Ayden. He remembered. He has a memory like I've never seen on a kid!! It just brings tears to my eyes everytime that precious boy brings up my precious baby! He still lives thru us even tho he is gone. Anthony keeps asking if Ayden will come out of the sky. Its hard that he doesnt fully understand, but so special that he doesnt forget his cousin. Sometimes he will ask "Whos Ayden" but then he remembers. And he knows he is in the sky. We released the balloons at Brielles baptism and the clouds formed and X, or if you tip your head, A cross!! The balloons went right for it!!! Oct 15 is Worldwide pregnancy and infant loss day. We will let our balloons go for our little boy. We would light the candles too, but we cant with his sisters oxygen. So we will send our thoughts and love up to you little man!

I am working 5 days this week, due to it being Sweetest Day Saturday, and me being a florist. So my sister came over today and watched Brielle and my mom is coming on Wednesday. I was a nervous nelly but after 2 hours I settled down. I have full trust in my Sister and my mother on Wednesday. My sister spends alot of time with me already and knows her Ps and Qs. She knows the monitors etc. It is nice to get out and put some hours under my belt, but one week will be enough! I will just go back to my Fri Sat Sun! I'm exhausted! And I have 3 more days to go yet, and we havent even gotten to the busiest day!! Living the dream!!! HA!

We took Brielle to The Pumpkin Place on Sunday with Grandma Cindy, Auntie Ema, and Cousin Anthony on Sunday! I posted some pics! Isnt she getting some cheeks on her????? It was fun! I cant wait til next year when she should be able to walk or crawl to her first pumpkin! Daddy got a big pumpkin, mommy a medium, Brielle a small pumpkin, and Ayden got a white pumpkin. We went thru the corn maze and laughed so hard! Thought my sister was going to have her baby in the corn maze!!! It was great fun!! Even pumpkin bowled!! We spent almost all day outside yesterday, doing yard work after the pumpkin picking, and I think Brielle really liked it!! She slept good last night! Which mommy appreciated having to work today! Now tonight she is fighting daddy to go to sleep :P That a girl! (as he would say!)

Monday, October 4, 2010

Shot day

Brielle had her 4 month shots today. Daddy was working so I took her by myself. It was okay until she got her shots. Then she cried and cried and cried. She was NOT happy!!! She did so well in the NICU! Probably because she had her nurse Kathy and her sugar water on her passy. They dont have that in the peds office. Got home and she was still cranky. Finally I got her to sleep by putting her in her swing on a pretty fast swing setting and she zonked off. The nurse kept on hitting her veins while giving her shots so she bled like crazy and they couldnt give the 3 in a row like normal because she had to keep stopping to make it stop bleeding. So we would settle her down and then have to rile her up 2 more times. I think dad might be bringing her in December for her 6 month shots.

The Dr is pleased with her progress. Adjust she is about 2 weeks old. He said for that age she is exceeding his expectations. She was looking up to find me and make sure I was still there and focusing on me. She was grabbing my fingers. And she was very alert. She is in the 25% percentile for weight 5% for height and head circumfrance which he said is good for her adjusted age. We talked about weaning her and as far as the oxygen, thats his last thing hes worried about right now. He is more worried about getting her off her caffeine and getting her heartrate to stay steady (bradys) and her to have no more apneas (stop breathing). So thats his primary goal right now is to resolve those bradys and apneas. If she is still on about the same settings on her oxygen in a month or so then he wants us to talk to a Dr in Milwaukee about what to do. So we will go from there. There was a few days that we got her down to a 1/16 liter but then she tires out. Hes hoping that as she gets more stronger and bigger she will get more stamina and be able to do it herself. He is very pleased with her color and her size. He said she doesnt look so "fragile." She has meat on her bones finally. Shes starting to fill out like a newborn!

Friday, October 1, 2010

4 months old

Today Brielle is 4 months old. Weighing in at 7lbs 6oz. Today I was wondering where the past 5 months ago. 5 months ago is when my water broke. I was admitted to the hospital and our battle to get to this point began. I am proud to say that we won that battle :) I would do it over in a heart beat! It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. We miss our baby boy more than ever, but with out him we may not have his sister right now. I will be the first to admit that now we are home things have settled and I have alot more time to think. Aydens passing is getting the best of me. I do not quite understand gods plan. I dont understand why he had to take my precious boy away from me. I do not understand why he had to have it happen so soon to have my precious girl go thru the fight of her life. I hope one day I can understand that plan of his and stop questioning. Im sure in time I will. But right now the pain is still there. I see little boys when I'm out and about and I miss him more than ever. I find myself looking at the little boy clothing. The little things that I still catch myself doing and have to say Hes gone let go. Easier said than done. I dont want Brielle to forget her twin brother. Her hero. With that being said Josh and I have started a "tradition" we want to begin and continue with Brielle. We want to release balloons up to Ayden at special events. Like her birthday. This weekend is her baptism and we will do it there as well. Its our way of saying your still here with us in our hearts little man. Josh is getting a tattoo tomorrow of Aydens foot prints and Brielles hand prints. Im pretty excited to see the outcome. He is getting it on his forearm so he will see it all day at work. Thats his memorial to his babies. I wear a cross from my uncle Bruce and Aunt deb everyday. I havent taken it off since Ayden passed. Those little quirks are all we have left. I guess everyone grieves differently. A friend from the NICU that lost her twin son as well was telling me that when she got home from the NICU her grieving her son took on full force. I didnt understand it until now. I completely understand what she means now! Life has settled down, my baby is home where she belongs, I have more time to think and evaluate and it is hitting home! I have one baby, not the two babies that we thought we'd have right now. But its reality and we have to take it as it is.

Brielle is doing very well at home! Monday we have her 4 month shots! She is still on the caffeine. We havent been able to wean her down on any oxygen so she is still at 1/8 of a liter. But one thing I have learned from the NICU is to not rush it. She will do things on her own. And as nurse Kathy always told me "Shes the boss." Aint that the truth!!! She has been staying awake a lot more! The at home nurses are very surprised at her alertness level due to her gestation. There have been 2 days now that she has been awake for almost 7 hours at a time. Taking a few 15 min naps here and there. Amazes me! Her noise levels are slowly increasing. She still doesnt cry very loud. She just grunts more than anything. Pooping is still a major issue with her. We are doing prune and pear juice altering back and forth. Glycerin is her best friend. She loves her boopie. She does okay in her swing. She has learned to roll onto her side. I will put her in the middle of her bassinet and she will roll on her side against the edge of it. I think she likes that barrier. The NICU had a nest like walls around her. Last night she moved all the way to the bottom of her bassinet against the edge. She lifts her head straight off our chest and looks around while holding herself up. She will position herself where she feels more comfortable. She definately is strong!!! But thats what got her to this point!!!

Monday, September 27, 2010


Brielle is 7lbs! So hard to believe! Shes definately came along ways from her 1 lbs 6oz! Were still battling the pooping issues! Had to give her glycerin yesterday & in a matter of minutes its coming out the sides of her diaper! Im glad it works atleast! So hard to see her struggle like that! I think she is trying to poop again because she is just cranky and fussy!! We have a pretty mellow week this week which is nice!! No appointments!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Same Old Same Old

Well its 6am. Up for the morning feed! Then off to work at 7. Not too much going on in our lives! Just alot of sleeping (Brielle not mom), feedings, diaper changes a7 alarms! Tom from Thedacare at home was over yesterday to down load her monitors and he was the one that taught us the CPR. So I was able to thank one more person off our list! He said he was glad we learned it but sad we had to use it. Us the same! Brielle is not gaining weight as she should be nor is she eating like she used to. She has a goal of 400ml a day and she is anywhere from 320-400. The nurses come 3x a week and say she looks and sounds good so not too sure what her deal is. Shes been stuck at 6lbs 13oz for 3 days. Shes too sleepy to eat. We try everything it just doesnt work. So they were talking about uping her caloris if she doesnt gain weight at todays visit. Well I have to wake dad up now to take over the feed as I type 1 handed so I can go to work. Have a great weekend everyone!!

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Original Due Date

So today is the date the twins were planned to arrive!! Of course they had plans of their own and came 16 weeks early!! Its hard to believe she is considered "Full term" and a "newborn" now. All the talk of "when shes full term" she will do this and that. Well its time Bri!! Your day has come! Now do big girl stuff!! Of course not!! She will do that on her own time and will as well :) As I look back (only 3 months, 2 weeks, and 4 days ago) Alot has taken place, good and bad in our lives. The changes have been incredible! I have longed to be a mom and I am a mom finally! The exhaustion has set in, but I am never too tired to jump out of bed and turn off that alarm. And feed her of course! The best part of my day is when she looks up at me and gives me that smile, that really is just gas! She makes us laugh all day! She will rumble your leg and then have a funny grin on her face! She will go from a face of smiles to a face that wants to belt out a cry! We could sit and stare at her all day!

My blog has a "Stats" tab that I can look at. I was AMAZED at the numbers!!!
Here are the numbers:
Pageviews today 55
Pageviews yesterday 88
Pageviews last month 3,715
Pageviews all time history 12,049

I knew quite a few people are following but I did not know that 55 people atleast looked at the blog today :) and 12,000 since I started it alittle over 4 months ago! Makes it all worth the few minutes I take to write a little blurp! And I'll admit! Its kind of relaxing for me!

Thursday when we brought her to the Dr. she weighed 6lbs 10oz. So now being Sunday Funday I'm sure she is around 6lbs 13-14oz. Hard to believe she should reach 7lbs this week! Their goal is for her to put on an ounce a day. So every 16 days she should gain a pound! But my little chunker surprised me!!! I fed her 60ml (2oz) at 4pm and between 4-6pm she ended up taking 4oz total (120ml) That is impressive for her!!! She just couldnt get enough! We didnt even force her to eat she got so mad when we took it away! But speaking of eating, Little Miss must sense I'm talking about her and she wants to eat now! Motherhood is calling...............

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Dispatcher Visit

So today we took Brielle to the Dr. after a home nurse visit. She thought Brielle was breathing to shallow and gained too much weight over night (3oz) so she thought she was retaining fluid & she was so fatigue & needing a few more Os. So we went into Dr. Kraniks office right away for a chest Xray and exam just in case. And as I suspected, She was just wore out and eating like a champ! She was SOOO crabby yesterday and was working on a big poo alll day she barely slept at all! So she just wore herself out! But like Dr said, it was better for us just to come in and check it off rather just say "We know its Brielle, and shes just tired" He figured that too but shes not like a "normal" baby. Shes more "fragile" as he says. She needs the little bit of extra monitoring and care. He said that as Nicu graduate parents we have a "Free Pass" He will fit us in his schedule any day we have concern. he does not want to see us back in the NICU as well as we dont want to go back!! But dont ask Brielle her opinion!! We tried telling her that she can just cooperate but like Dr. Kranik said, he has already learned to "not trust" her and hes only met her 3 times. Boy O Boy does she make an impression quickly!!! hehe

We went to meet our dispatcher that helped us save Brielle a week ago today! Her name is Jennifer Echols. She was so happy to meet Brielle and told Josh and I how great of a job we did that night! She said if she would have had to calm me down to talk to her Brielle might not be here. I also learned a quite scary statistic. She is nominated for a "life saver" award. In 7 years there have only been 3 issued. You read right THREE!! When anyone goes PNB (patient not breathing) they are usually too far gone and dont get revived. So when a dispatcher helps revive a critical patient they are honored with this life saver reward. It was honestly pretty shocking to hear how close Brielle was to death. And hearing it from a complete stranger that deals with it day in and day out really hit us hard! Josh was speechless and couldnt even utter a word! I'm greatful for all the quick responses we got that night and greatful for the outcome! We are going to send a thank you card also to the Freedom First Responders that were on scene so quickly!! We can not thank everyone who has touch our lives in some way shape or form unfortunately! I wish we could! We have our miracle that we love sooo much! From the OB nurses and Dr. Ramsey. To the NICU Drs Katie, Abe and Debbie. To the MANY NICU nurses! To now the at home nurses, Dr Kranik and now the first responders and Gold Cross ambulance. The list is HUGE!! And they all contributed some way to give us our precious little miss Brielle!! Thank you!

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Brielles home AGAIN

Brielle came home today around 4pm. She is now on caffeine once a day. Shes soo much like her dad! She needs her morning mt. dew!! Just like Dr. Debbie says...She looks like her mother and acts like her father :) She is on 1/16 of oxygen which is pretty low! lowest we've been able to get her yet! Her sats are 98 but her heart rates been low all day. Its 120 right now. Shes usually like 150s. She was that way in the hospital so they didnt seem to concerned about it. But I dont want to wean her oxygen too fast and make her crash. So we will just leave her for awhile and let her get used to being home. She was swinging in her swing when we got home and she liked that for awhile! Then I just layed her on the couch to sleep and she liked that even better. The dogs are crazy all over trying to get used to her. Think they've never seen her! Daddys enjoying snuggling on the couch right now with her. Tonights spa day! Were trying to settle back into our routine as "A family".

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Another Episode

Well Little Miss is still in the NICU. She decided to stop breathing again last night for her nurses. Her heart rate dropped to 60 and Thurs it was down to 42 so not as low but they said she was still blue last night so they were worried bout her. The Dr decided she needs to get back on caffeine. So that takes 2-3 days to get the caffeine level so she is going to stay til atleast tues-wed. She got the caffeine around noon today and when I got there at 12:30 she was wired!!! I had her sitting on my lap and she looked left, right, left, right, left really quick we laughed hysterically! She was so awake and wouldnt cave to go to sleep! She was wrapped in the hospital blanket so I took her soft plush blanket from home and wrapped her up in that and she fell asleep almost right away. She just likes the nice soft blankets!!

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Still in the NICU

Well Brielle is going on her third night in the NICU now. They are still holding her hostage til she poops and gains weight. She pooped after she got her enema. I do not believe she lost weight because when she was in the ER they didnt take the 2 heat packs off her leg and arm. And they are pretty big and add some weight. When we got to the NICU the admitting nurse didnt weigh her because she was just weighed in the ER. So I do not think she lost any weight. She is 6lbs .1oz tonight!! Finally hit the 6 pound mark! of course she had to do it in the NICU! We tried telling her if she missed her nurses that much that we are welcome to go visit and leave! But its unacceptable to make that big of a drama fest over missing her nurses :) Everyones been great!! I was under the impression Thursday she would be coming home Friday. Then Friday came and it was Saturday which I was okay with. Then today Josh tells me at work she cant come home and I broke down. I think I reached my breaking point today. It was a VERY emotional day for me to say the least. I feel so bad that she was so constipated and in pain and then had that horrible freak mom and dad out moment! And then she had to be readmitted to the NICU which was my worst nightmare from the day we left! And now its going on 3 days not just overnight like originally planned. I just couldnt handle it! I know its in the best interest of Brielle! I really do! Its just she came home and wasnt supposed to go back! But once again nothing in our lives has gone as planned! Our pregnancy didnt go anywhere near planned! Our plan of two healthy beautiful babies came out as one little miracle and one angel baby! And why would we think it would continue normally? Brielle can stop being a drama queen any day now!!! Her nurse Kathy was telling her that and that she cant come back except to visit and Brielle gave her "the lip" It was so funny! So we are praying that they give us the OK tomorrow to bring her home and hopefully keep her home forever!!

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Worst Nightmare come true

Well its official!! I always had a worst nightmare that Bri would come home and have to go back to the hospital. It came true tonight! We were on our way to Joshs moms house and as soon as we pulled up Brielles monitors were going off and her heart rate and sats were dropping FAST!! I jumped out of the car and yanked her carseat out of its base and set it behind my seat and grabbed her as fast as I could and started stimulating her like normal. This time she wasnt reacting to it at all. Her heart rate kept dropping further and further and she got bluer and bluer. Josh grabbed her from me and tried and nothing. We took her to the grass and layed her down to try and then Rodger got home and we both yelled she isnt breathing. Rodger came running over and Josh and Rodger grabbed her and her oxygen and monitors and we ran to the house with her. They laid her on the couch and tried to stimulate her again but she was so blue and lifeless I knew it wasnt good. Rodger said do you want to call 911. So I did. The dispatcher helped Josh with CPR but he didnt need her. He remembered the training from a week ago! As soon as the first officer arrived he got Brielle to take a nice gasp for air!! It was a miracle!!! Then the first responders got there and took over. Josh just got up and had to walk away. Pretty overwhelmed! He saved his daughters life! The paramedics just watched her breathing and made sure she stayed alert til the ambulance got there and then Josh and the paramedics took her back to Theda Clark Hospital. My worst nightmare! She went back! She was going to go to the Pediatric "Big Girl floor" but we threw in that we would prefer the NICU since we were comfortable and they all knew Bri as well. Dr Debbie was down in the ER before we knew it! She told us no return policies but she took her back anyways :) She has to be in isolation which is just her own little room in her own little corner all by herself with her own nurse. You know she is "DIRTY" since she was out in the world now lol. So all in all in the end we came up with the conclusion that she pinched her vengal (sp) nerve which runs in your neck while she was trying to push since she has been constipated all day. They say that older adults do it as well and older adults will fall off the toilet. Babies just pass our or lose their breath but cant regain their breath that quick so they need the extra help. So lets just say everyone can buy stock in Prune Juice and Glycerin because mom and dad, grandma and grandpa, and great grandmas dont ever ever ever want to experience what we experienced tonight!!! Daddy was great! Jumped right in! I was too hysterical and called 911 and went outside for a minute. All I could think of when I seen my baby laying on that couch lifeless was O god Im going to lose another one. God wasnt going to let that happen thank the lord! Ayden was DEFINATELY watching over us once again!!!!! Now me and Brielle have 2 heros in our lives.....Daddy and Ayden!!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Almost have a 6 pounder on my hands!!!

So far we got almost all of Brielles appointments done this week. Friday she has another home nurse visit and Birth to 3 program starts on Friday as well. So lets see.....Her eye appointment went very well! She was cleared and will go back in June. So she is exactly where they want her to be after her ROP surgery. Her eyes look like a normal babies eyes again!! YAY! It was so grueling to sit and listen to her "try" to cry and then after her eyes were so sore and red and she just looked in pain. My heart went out to her! But she was a trooper as she always has been!

Today was her pediatrician visit and she is up to 5lbs 14oz!! She should hit 6lbs this week yet. Friday the nurse will weigh her so we will see the final numbers then :)

Yesterday a friend we met at the Nicu, Stefani, came with her daughter Lilianna. Lilianna was a 25 weeker and was also a twin. They lost her brother 8 days after birth. Lili is now 5 months old and been home since June and she weighs 13lbs 7oz!! It was sooo weird to hold a 13lbs baby!! My little almost 6 pounder doesnt even compare lol. But it made me realize she will be 13 lbs before I know it! How sad! Josh trys to tell me to put her down once in awhile but I dont listen :) She will not want to cuddle with me before I know it. So I am taking full advantage of her wanting to snuggle while I can! It is wonderful to not have to leave her behind at the NICU. To be able to wake up and lay in bed with her as a family and not have to jump in the shower and drive to the NICU. However, my car isnt too sure whats going on!! I dont use it as much as I used to and it wants to keep driving to Neenah to see all those wonderful nurses!! Got to talk to nurse Laura today which was great! And Rosie from discharge called me to see how Little Miss was doing! Nice to keep in touch!

Monday, September 6, 2010

Busy week!

Hey Everyone!! Brielle is doing great at home!! Had one incident today when daddy left and ran to the store. Me and little miss were snuggling on the couch watching TV and I was watching her heart rate on the monitor and seen it decreasing and it got to about 88 (80 is when they consider it a brady) so I wiggled her to wake her up like we always do but she just couldnt get her sats up for her oxygen. She was in such a deep deep sleep! They were down in the 53s 60s 70s hit the 80 goal mark but then went back down all while maintaining her heart rate in the 130-140s. So I had to bump her up to 1/2 liter from an 1/8 liter of oxygen. Her color looked great so I wasnt worried and I could feel her breathing but the sats have me stumpfed! Maybe Nurse laura, terri or Kathy could weigh in on it while reading :P Miss you guys by the way :) The home nurse called me tonight and I ran it by her but she is confused as well. Said maybe her probe wasnt on her foot all the way or something. He apnea monitor never went off so I dunno. Shes always throwing everyone for a loop! Gotta keep us on our toes I suppose ;)

Shes got a busy week! Tomorrow she goes for her follow up eye appointment! Then one of our dear friends I met at the NICU, Stef and Lilianna, are coming over to give Bri a bunch of clothes. And then 1pm her nurse comes over to check up on her and do her weigh in. On Wed she goes to see her pediatrician, Dr Kranik, at 9am then at 10am respiratory is coming to make sure her monitors and oxygen are doing their jobs! And Mommys back to work on Friday. Hard to believe in 2 days she will have been home 1 week already. It is absolutely wonderful! I love the fact that I dont ever have to leave her, well for the most part! The hard part is I miss all the wonderful nurses we have met over the 3 months in childrens. They have become family! They've seen us at our best worst and highs and lows and happys and sad days. Thank goodness for facebook!!!! Now just gotta get a few on board yet, you know who you are (uh hum Terri/Kathy)!! Brielle is resting semi nicely in our room in her bassinet. I hear a few alarms going off but dads in there and I think she is resolving them before he can even react. She for the most part only gets up twice a night. She usually eats around 9pm then at 12:30ish then again at 3:30ish and then 6:30-7am. She hasnt cried yet so were still waiting. Shes a pretty happy content baby so far. Got a few family photos taken today! Ill post when I get them back :) I know everyone keeps asking me to keep posting on Brielle so I definately will! I probably wont be updating everyday since I am busier now and theres not a whole lot to update on her. But I will definately try every couple of days :) Thanks everyone for the support!!

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Getting adjusted

Well we have made it thru the first few days!! The first night went great and mom and dad got way more sleep than ever expected! Then the 2nd night came. Oh my! Those monitors were beeping saying she wasnt breathing atleast 6 times in 8 hours. I dont know if she really wasnt or not. Sometimes if she is moving around she can throw of an alarm so its more about watching her than listening to the alarm, but when your sleeping you cant do that so we just react as if she isnt breathing. But last night she only stopped once. It went from a brady to an apnea and when I put my hand on her she wasnt but then she took a deep breath. Everyone says how scary it is but its just our life. We would have denied her coming home if we werent okay with it. The wonderful nurses have showed us what to do in that situation. In 99% of the cases we dont need to do anything, she comes out of it herself. I asked the nurse because I was concerned she had so many last night and she said as long as she doesnt need alot of stimulation and help coming out shes not concerned. She said shes only 37 5/7 weeks so she will grow out of it soon. She had her first nurse visit to the house yesterday and she has another today. Their scale says she is up to 5lbs 9oz. She is eating like a champ!! she is taking between 50-60ML every feeding. 30ML is an ouce so shes nearing 2oz every 3 hourish. We are all settling pretty nicely I'd have to say! We are learning her noises and what she wants when she does certain things. She doesnt cry she just grunts and makes like little spitting sounds with her mouth when shes mad. This morning she was rutsing around in her bassinet so I thought she was hungry, but nope she just wanted to cuddle with her mama :) Got that one figured out :)

Thursday, September 2, 2010

1st night.....

Brielle had a very good first night home!!! We werent sure what to expect of course so we were just going to wing it!! We kept her on her every 3 hour feeds as the NICU had her on, but at 10:30p she didnt want to wake up for nothing. Nurse Kathy told me when I asked that I could let her go as much as 5 hours but dont let her exceed that so I thought, well I'll let her go and see if she wakes to eat. I set my alarm for 12:30a just in case. She never did wake up, so good thing I set it! She took 50ML at 12:30a then 55ML at 3:30a & 53ML at 6:45a. Shes definately a good eater! Then we got to the Dr at 8:30a and she took another 20ML well before her normal 3 hours were up! Grow baby grow! The dogs are taking to her pretty well. The older one, my baby, Chloe still is hesitant and will go up to her when SHE feels like it. She usually stays in the other room but can still see us. She is moping around but she will get used to it eventually! Gabbi on the other hand............She was so excited Josh had to hold her back cuz she was going to lick Bri to death! It was cute. So we were doing some laundry and catching up on our 3 months worth of chores that stacked up and came back in the room and Gabbi was laying right next to Brielle on our bed all snuggled up!! It was ADORABLE!!!! Here we thought she would be so rough with her but she truly knows she has to take it easy around her!! Brielles alarms havent been too bad now that we got the leads figured out! We had the sticky ones on her but they would keep falling off her chest and then it would alarm. Not a big deal right? WRONG! These alarms are for when she stops breathing and they are EAR PIERCING!!! It happened twice last night when we were sleeping and you all probably would have laughed your butts off watching Josh and I spring out of bed. Never seen Josh got out of bed that fast! Maybe I can keep it for when he goes back to work!! :) All in all, we got more rest than expected! Brielle is a very good baby so far! She rarely fusses and hasnt cried yet. We just cant stop staring at her! :) We are so happy shes finally home!!!!!! Had to go visit our nurses tho today! We missed them already! Kathy knew she would have Bri withdrawls so she hid some of her stuff :) On the way to the hospital, I said to Josh that it was probably a good thing we forgot stuff cuz I needed my Kathy time as much as Kathy needed her Bri time :) The nurses have become our family and thats whats hard about being home! I cant see all their smiling faces weekly! But we will try to stay in touch as long as possible! I want them all to come to Brielles wedding :) Not that I'm pushing her to grow up or anything........

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Our Baby is home!

What a great day for everyone! Exactly 3 months to the date Brielle is home!! 93 days in the NICU! Its been quite the ride! But we made it! We are still trying to figure out our "routine" as to be expected. How to carry her around the house will all her wires and trying not to worry too much when we put her down for a minute. Figuring out all her noises and what they mean! When we first got home she started to fuss. And I just kinda said to myself "Hmmm wonder what she wants. I just changed her she just ate at the NICU, I usually have the nurses to tell me what she wants." Now its all on me and Josh. I got her a bottle and she ate another 10ML. Little chunker. Then 2 hours later she took 50ML. 7:30am she had a huge poop for me at the hospital and around 4:30 she was SUPER crabby so dad of course hands her to me and I go to look in her diaper OMG is all I can say!!! I dont know where this girl stores it all! It was almost up her back!!! Then her wires got in it and O boy! Well we have company so I will write more tomorrow and let everyone know how her first night went! And ours of course! But wanted to tell everyone that she is home!!!

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Custody battle over????

Im 99.7% sure that our custody battle will be over tomorrow!!! And I think we won!! Little Miss passed her car seat test tonight!!! Mom and Dad had oxygen, sat monitor, and apnea monitor and CPR training tonight. All her tests are done and passed. She is eating well and gaining weight so the nurses cant seem to find a reason the doctor would keep her! Tomorrow will be day 92! At day 100 she gets a party! Sorry guys! I think mom and dad will just have their own party in 8 days! We arent staying a week just for that :) I will let you know when and if our little girl is home and settled. Check back for later updates........................

Monday, August 30, 2010


Sooooo I have some news that I want to share but dont want to jinx us!! But so many of you have been so supportive and on this rollercoaster with us, cried with us, laughed with us, smiled with us, and worried with us! SO I'm just going to spill the beans!!! Brielle MIGHT get to come home Wed/Thurs. That is the doctors goal anyways! She told me today just literally 15 minutes ago I couldnt even wait to get it out! Tomorrow she has an MRI on her head to make sure that nomore cysts popped up. She will be coming home on oxyen and a monitor but we will take her on whatever she needs! She also has to do the carseat test, but Dr Debbie said she kind of has an advantage there because shes coming home on oxygen anyways so if she desats mildly its no big deal! She passed her hearing test yesterday! Her eyes are looking great! Mom and dad need to do the oxygen and monitor and CPR training before she leaves. Other than that we are well on our way to heading out the door and in our home as a family for the first time! Our little 24 week miracle baby is actually coming home! I cant believe it and I wish someone was here to pinch me!!! It has been such a distant dream for the last 3 months and now its becoming a reality! This journey has not been an easy one! But we have such GREAT family and friends, that know who they are, that have made our process just alittle bit easier! This process has brought alot of people closer and our faith stronger! God has sure answered alot of prayers! Ayden has once again done his job and is sending his sister home to mom and dad! She is definately worth this rollercoaster ride and journey! But we are all more than willing for this ride to slow down for a bit! Dr Debbie says dont count it! Brielle always has to have some drama in her exciting life :) Boy aint that the truth!! Like Nurse Terri said, Shes had the full NICU experience! From the Oscillator to vent to CPAP to vapotherm to oxygen tank shes been on every type of breathing machine sometimes more than once! From being a miracle and healthy to getting so sick with pneumonia, not once but twice, we questioned her fate, to coming home 2 weeks before her due date. To facing the PDA surgery to avoiding it! Having laser surgery and doing very well! Having 2 cysts on her brain and we have faith she will too beat those odds! Just to name a few! All in all our miracle is coming home!!!

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Post #100

Well this is officially my 100th post!! HOLY MOLY! What does that say? Its been almost 4 long months of our life that have changed our lives forever. But we could not be happier. We have a beautiful baby girl who amazes us day after day! She is what keeps us going every day after we are sore and tired and exhausted and would love to just throw in the towel. We got news today that her PDA is closed!!! YAY!! No ligation surgery for that! Dr Abe said that we might hear it once in awhile but its just the vessels that we hear. There is some sort of "valley" that babies who have their PDA open for quite a time still have. But all in all...No surgery and it closed is all I really heard! hehe. This morning I fed little chunker a bottle of 44ML and she was still trying to eat me and everything else that came in her path! She was a mad woman! And she even cried, like alot! She turned all red and held her breath until I rubbed her and she let it out. Put the nuc in front of her and she couldnt get it fast enough!! But even with that she wasnt happy! Geez louise I thought! So I talked to her nurse Pam and told her how she acted and she said she would talk to Abe about putting her on that adlib demand schedule and he agreed to it so she took 50ML for Pam at 1:30 feeding and then took 57ML for dad at 4:30 feeding. I thought 44ML would be a struggle to get into her but she just wanted more! Once again, proved us wrong. They also stopped the diaretic that helps take any fluid off her lungs. He doesnt want her going home on that. We dont either. So we will see how she does with that! Hoping her lungs dont get "wet sounding." She has an oxygen tank that now just attaches to her crib or we wheel with her since she is on a much lower liter flow as they had anticipated her to be on already. Shes down to a 1/16th now. She weighs 5lbs 2.5 now. Getting bigger! Had spa day today and her nurse said she is a natural woman! She just layed there and let me wash her hair and soaked it all in, literally!

Friday, August 27, 2010

Gotta Love Set backs

Well little Miss is taking her own approach on things! She didnt like mom and dads goal of going home next week. Dr Abe came to talk to us today and said that we shouldnt plan on her going home next week. :( She has been having more bradys and desats when she is eating. Sally from speech therapy came to feed her today and she desated quite a bit during her feeding. She said she isnt ready yet to go home the way she is eating right now. He did however lower her cannula flow to 1/8 of a liter which is the lowest the one on their wall goes so they were trying to find a new flow sensor thingy or were going to have to hook her up to an oxygen tank that goes lower than 1/8. So I guess at this point were just going to go day by day and try not to look to far ahead. Shes the boss as nurse Kathy would say! Boy does she know her or what!!! This news has my head spinning. In one sense I know its best for her. In another I'm super bummed! We were doing so well and moving at a good pace, and I quit my job, and my baby was coming home!! Everything was PERFECT! Now everythings up in the air! Never know what to think. Dr Abe did say tho that shes proved everyone wrong already so she could just all of the sudden take off and make it home late next week, but not if she continues this way. My emotions are stirring everywhere and I feel like I could just bawl at the drop of a dime! But no time for that! Need to just keep trucking and leave it in gods hands! He hasnt failed us yet and he wont this time!

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Day full of CHECKS off the list!

Well not too much to report today! But I knew lots of people would be checking in for the next update, so I thought I should write something atleast! So lets see......

She had her eyes checked again today and he said they are looking as normal as he would like and healing very well! CHECK!

She ripped her feeding tube out about 1:20am Tuesday so they havent had it put back in since! no feeding tube..CHECK!

She has been taking all of her feedings....CHECK! Today she is starting to poop out tho, so I will be curious to see if they caved and put her tube back in. Chris said last night "Not on my watch" HEHE!

Brielles ride home at hospital....CHECK! Felt so weird to carry a carseat!!!

Got Dr Abe on board to discharge her next week CHECK!

Dr Abe reduced her calories to 22 cal which is what she will go home on CHECK! Now she has to eat 44ML! CHUNKER!

Got a bath tonight CHECK! She was alittle more relaxed this one not as edgy. But you can tell shes getting older and is getting a voice! OH NO! Shes been listening to her noisy neighbors and I told her not too! Guess shes not going to be a good listener :)

She is having a ECHO on her heart tomorrow and another blood gas and Dr abe is going to try to go down on her oxygen liters so he can get her to 100% oxygen soon. He said that monday he wants us to do the monitor training that we will be bringing her home on. We will need to know how to work the oxygen tanks and monitors and what medicine she will need to take and times etc. We need to take CPR yet before we bring her home. So we have quite a few more CHECKS to put on the list but we are getting there! 7 is enough for today! :) She weighed in at 5lbs 1.2oz!

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Family Room

Today was a GREAT day for mom! Everything was going right in my day and then when I got to the hospital it got even better! I walked into her room and she was gone! I thought maybe she was having a test done to go home or something, but Nurse Kathy put her arm around me and started walking out the room and proceeded to tell me she was in the family room waiting for me!!!!! WHATTTT!!! that means she is on the nasal cannula!! One more step closer to running out that door! Sure enough, there she was! In her crib in the family room! She is still hooked up to oxygen and a monitor but it will be what she comes home on so they put us in the family room to get us used to no nurses and her sounds and basically to feel more comfortable with her. Kathy told me when she came in alittle while later that I havent stopped smiling! You know how long I've been waiting for this day? ALONG TIME! I called my sister to tell her and she said "Now you get to sit on the couch and watch TV with her" I've always said that just those little things that are "normal" I have longed for are now here! So thats what we've been doing! Sitting in the lazy boy snuggling and watching TV. She has been quite content. She hasnt had many desats, and even didnt have one for 2 1/2 hours which is pretty amazing for her! I have to say tho after 4 hours with her alone, I am feeling pretty content! We are going to reserve a family room for this weekend and spend more time one on one with her and really get comfortable with her this weekend since they are talking discharge next week already! We have to wait til Mon or Wed tho cuz thats when Kathys on :) All in all its been a GREAT day that we've been looking forward to for along time! We are getting everything all set for her arrival home! After 3 months in the NICU we will have full custody of her vs. our supervised visits!! :P

OOOOOOOOO AND! News just coming in from our little private family room.........

BRIELLE IS 5 pounds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 5lbs .4oz to be exact!!!!! HOLY MOLY!! This is too much good news in one day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope it keeps coming our way!!! We need it!!

Monday, August 23, 2010

Reality is hitting hard!

Well not too much to report! Just recovering very well and back to the bottle feeds!! Her eyes are looking much better! Alittle swollen yet but not too bad! She nippled 29ML for me at 7:30 and got fed by tube at 10:30 then took her whole bottle of 36ML at 1:30 feeding and took the whole thing again at 4:30 for dad!! Brielle got to go in her first swing today! She liked it alot! Guess that means we need to buy her a swing now! She had spa day today but was not a happy camper! Not sure what the deal was! She always loves spa day! The water was alittle cooler maybe she likes a hot bath like her mama! I think she was starvin too! She can barely make it to the 3 hour mark to feed! She will be happy when they put her on whats called an adlib demand schedule where she wakes and eats when she wants. She is back down to the 4 liters on her vapotherm. She was at 2 liters when she had the surgery. So we are getting there and almost back to where she was before her surgery! Doctors are talking about releasing her around labor day week. It is sinking in with Josh and I. We have always felt like we arent parents or we are parents with "supervised visits." We didnt get to experience the full pregnancy of them kicking or getting extremely huge to wear maternity, etc. Nothing was normal about this experience as I've said before so we are kind of doing it backwards it sems. After going back to work after having her I today turned in my 2 weeks notice of stepping down. And then we will be bringing home baby. It was bittersweet handing that letter in today. I am sad to leave the people not the job. Over the 7 years I have made some great friends thru the years. I just know where my heart is and Brielle needs me more than anything! We fought extremely hard for her and in return she fought even harder! She is our miracle and she will never forget that. Since yesterday when it has finally sunk in that she IS ours and she WILL be coming home in the next 2 weeks we have some closure coming our way. She will be solely ours. We have been waiting 83 days for that day to come! We are racing to the finish line full force! Hopefully we have no more bumps in the road that keep her here any longer! Full speed ahead!!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

On the road to recovery!

Brielle is doing pretty good! Her eyes are still red, puffy, and sore. But we expected that. She was pretty fussy today and had troubles settling so they were giving her tylenol. She had a 4 diaper poop for daddy! That a girl! Get him broke in!! She is still on the 6 liters of vapo so Dr Katie said this week we should be able to get her down and maybe off and on the nasal cannula. Other than that nothing really new to report! Which is always a good thing!

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Eye Surgery- Check

Brielles eye surgery went pretty good! She had to be intubated (breathing tube put back down her throat) almost right away. She stopped breathing and had some heart rate dips and wasnt too happy! So they said after they put the tube in, she was much happier! The procedure ended up taking around 2 hours. We were hoping to have her extubated by 6pm but she was still pretty out of it and sleepy therfore not wanting to breath on her own. So they were leaving her intubated and Lauras goal is to have her extubated by morning. All the alarms and the tube back down, and not seeing her breath very hard, not seeing her awake, not getting to hold her, etc. was bringing back sooo many memories of about a month ago that we werent too keen on! Felt like we took about 20 steps backwards in a matter of hours! Hopefully by morning when we get there she will have taken atleast 10 steps back in the right direction and on her way to coming home in our loving arms where we've been longing for since June! Just another bump in the road. We should be good at all these bumps by now, but I think we were getting to used to the steady road ahead!

Friday, August 20, 2010

Eye Surgery

Well its official! Eye laser surgery tomorrow morning at 10am. I, in a way feel relieved its just being done and will be over but I feel bad for Brielle. All that she has endured over her short 80 day life, she just cant catch a break. BUT I guess if she has to have any surgery, this is the one we'd choose. Less invasive and quick recovery!! Please send all prayers and happy thoughts her way tomorrow! Hoping it provides a GREAT outcome!

Brielle is now up to 4lbs 12.2oz! Little pork chop!! Still doing good on her 2 liters and they are talking about putting her on the nasal cannula and getting her ready to come home since she will come home on O2!! BRING IT ON!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Center of Attention

Brielle is now down to 2 liters on her vapotherm!!!! She is almost off vapo and on the nasal cannula!! She can come home on nasal cannula not on vapo! So big step!! Then she has to learn how to eat! Yesterday she took 20% of her feeding! Not too bad! Eye appt tomorrow. Other than that not too much to report! Bath day, vapo turned down, drank all but 5ML at 130 for me! Busy day for her! She was wore out tonight when we left! Justin and Lavonne came tonight to see her and her belly was getting full and she had a brady so Angela, her nurse, told Josh to put her on his arm the long way and hold her like that. She LOVED it! and so did all the nurses!!! Nurse Liz from OB hapened to come up and drop off some milk for Bris neighbor so she came to say Hi and then Kristin from RT came and LOVED it so she spread the word and pretty soon there were about 6 nurses all gawking at little miss. It was cute!!!!

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Another day down!

Well Brielle is now 4lbs 9.2oz! She is still doing the bottle feeding and continuing to do pretty well! She took 8ML at 7:30am and 18ML at 1:30pm and she is working on her 4:30pm feeding right now. Doing pretty good, so Im guessing about all of it. Those are all out of 36ML. Still down to the 3liters of vapotherm setting. Other than that, its been a slow but steady week! Tomorrow probably will be her eye exam again. See how that turns out!

Monday, August 16, 2010

Day 76 down!

Another great day in the land of Brielle! Lets see....where should I start??? Her vapotherm breathing machine was turned down to 3liters!!!!! I heard that 2 was the lowest setting and then they wean her to the nasal cannula!! She can go home on oxygen but not on vapotherm!!! VERY happy to see the 3 on the monitor when I got there at 3pm! She was WIDE awake too and carline said she was awake most of the day!! She is starting to cry and whimper and wine alittle bit more. I think she is taking after her two noisey neighbor boys! NOT a good thing little miss!

Brielle is 4 1/2 pounds!! Feels like yesterday I was just reporting she was 3lbs and now shes almost 5! So hard to believe! I am starting to bring newborn clothes to the hospital since her preemie are getting snug already!

Last but not least! She took 29ML for dad tonight again, out of 37ML! SO the speech therapist, Sally, was there watching her feed and she agreeded that if Brielle was showing signs she wanted to take the bottle, she could have it!! Before it was once every 12 hours, now its when she wants too!! Shes doing so well noone can believe she took to the feedings on her own so quick and so well! We cant either! She is truly amazing and always seems to amaze us each and every day!

Sunday, August 15, 2010


BRIELLE ATE HER WHOLE ENTIRE BOTTLE OF 35ML tonight for daddy!! What a big girl!! Tracey her nurse said that she is very impressed!!! To top it off, she had a bath right before which makes her tired to begin with. And then her two patches on the side of her face had to be replaced, and her feeding tube tape, and her one lead on her chest fell off! So she cried for about 5 minutes. That all takes ALOT out of her! So for her to endure all that stuff and still take a bottle is pretty impressive to all!

Brielle is now up to 4lbs 5oz! She is getting too big! Of course she is! The way she chomps that bottle she will come home 10lbs! Now her biggest hurdle to get her home is her oxygen needs. She can come home on oxygen but she cant come home on vapotherm so she needs to get off that! Dr. Debbie said between 3-5 weeks is accurate. Its so close we can taste it!!
We are exhausted from running this marathon and we can see the finish line but just cant get there yet!

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Almost taking a full bottle!!

Brielle is doing soooooo amazing!!! She took 20Ml of 35 the first time she bottle fed. Then that night she only took 7ML. Then this morning she took 20ML and then tonight daddy got her to take 25ML!! Shes not leaving too much in the bottle!!! GO GIRL!! The doctor came in to see Brielle after her bottle feeding this morning and Dr Debbie said that it is amazing that she is getting that much!! She said that with Brielle being 24 weeker and a very sick baby and on all the oxygen shes been on, its surprising that this early she has the suck swallow breath even in play yet. She said that even a baby born at 32 weeks barely has it down at 34 weeks. Brielle will be 35 weeks Sunday!!! Soooo nice to hear news about your baby like that!! And from the Doctor that gets to boot your baby out the door!! :)

She is up to 4lbs 3oz!! We actually had to bring in Newborn clothes today because her preemie clothes barely fit and she gets fussy when shes too tight! who wouldnt!! She also had to be moved up to the newborn swaddle sack because preemie was scrunching her tootsies. Shes doing very well in her crib!!! Very proud of your litte miracle! Me and Daddy got her room all painted and put back together! wasnt going to paint it since we have all the time in the worls ;P But mama got a bug up her you know where and just decided to do it!! Im pleased we did even tho we can barely keep our eyes open right now! I will post pics when it is done completely!

Friday, August 13, 2010


Brielle had another Big Day!!!! First was her AMAZING first bottle feed. She took 20ML of her 35ML!!!!! The Speech therapist had to come do her first feeding with us and she said that she had never seen a baby suck like Brielle was!! She wouldnt stop, she had to make her take a break! She said she was "Amazed" at her! Mom and dad are so proud of her!! We werent going to give her another bottle til 7:30 but she had her Spa day again today so she was wide awake and Tracey thought we should just give it a shot! If she did bad we would stop! She only took 7ML that time, but she was tired from her bath and we didnt want to push her too much! Also I dont think I know all the tricks yet to get it in her like Sally knows! All in all I think she did very well for her first time getting the bottle!!!

She had spa day! Grandma Kris and great grandma Kathy came to watch!! She was sooo awake! My mom held her after and just talked to her and she just looked right up at her and focused on what she was saying. It was adorable!

Brielle weighs alittle bit more today, 4lbs 1.8oz. Not a huge jump, but we will take it! She is almost grown out of her preemie clothes so I will have to get out the newborn and bring some up here! The nurse said to not worry about newborn clothes cuz she will jump to the 3mo!! Go Brielle!!!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

From head to toe, watch me grow!

From Head to Toe, Watch me Grow I'm 4lbs 1.5oz today!!!!! Clever Nurse Terri came up with that!! :) Brielle was also moved to a big girl crib today!!! It is alittle bigger than her isolette was but still smaller than the normal crib, but it has the slats etc. She has to be swaddled so she can keep her temp. So far so good! She doesnt like the process tho of putting on the onezie, jammas, and being swaddled! But she will get used to it!

At 7:30 Friday morning speech therapy is coming to give Brielle her first BOTTLE!!!! So we will be there while she trys to feed and see what she does with it!!

Mom and Dad are on cloud 9 right now!!!

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

4 liters!!!

Well....Came to her 1:30 feeding today and Miss Kathy had a nice surprise for mama!! They turned her Vapotherm settings down to 4 liters!! Which means if she stays and does well and stops being sassy, she can start bottle feeding next week! She was alittle up in her oxygen % but she is working harder! We managed to get her down to about 34% and then she was sassy and had bradys and had to be turned back up. Stinker! So we will see if dad can work his magic tonight :) Eye appointment tomorrow to see if she is the same, worse, or better. Asked Dr. Debbie when she would put Brielle in a crib and her exact words were "When she gets fatter" lol she has to be about 4.5lbs she said. OKAY OKAY I guess we will wait it out!!! I cant wait but we can wait ya know? It will be exciting to see her in something other than a plastic box! Like a real baby crib! For 10 weeks we have seen other babys in cribs and going home etc and being bottle fed, and we are SO ready for it to be Brielles turn! Let the milestones keep coming!!!

Well I am editing this post since I got to the hospital and got new news:

We just got the news that she doesnt have to have the surgery this week. Her eyes have progressed from last week but not as rapidly. He said it wouldnt surprise him if in the next 1-3 weeks she would have to have it but as we said before, he has been wrong and he hopes he is wrong again!

Laura also changed her feeding tube (OG-oral) to a NG (nasal) So now her feeding tube is down her nose instead of down her mouth. We will see how she likes that better!

And last but not least her weight!!...........READY for it............How bout now?............Drum roll please...........suspense music.......okay okay here it is........3lbs 15.7oz. Little stinker!! So tomorrow she SHOULD gain that .3oz and hit 4lbs!! Far from her 1 lbs 6.6 oz at birth! Getting to be a big girl!! Brielle just does not want to be a big girl and get to 4 pounds!! Geez louise!!

Monday, August 9, 2010

34 weeks

Brielle is 34 2/7 weeks old! So she needs to start doing big girl stuff!! Like breathing on her own, and nippling, and no more As & Bs and no more desats. She weighs 3lbs 13.6oz! So close to 4lbs! Shes really starting to put on the weight now!! Came in today to Laura and Terri talking about Brielle going in a crib. A Crib is a good thing! BUT Brielle does NOT like noise, she has to work alittle harder to maintain her temp, the bright lights will be on her since there is no blanket to cover her up anymore, and she will have to be swaddled. And this little girl does NOT like to be contained!! So it will be interesting to see how she does. They lowered her vapo therm today to 5 liters!!!! And she is at 28% even after lowered!! She was always in the high 40%s when she was on 6 liters so hopefully this is a good thing that will stay and keep going down!!! Well little girl is getting antsy to go back in her pod!!

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Weekend of Showers complete :)

Brielle had her second shower today at grandma Cindys house for daddys family. It was very nice!! We have sooo much stuff for Bri when she gets home :) We put some of it away but we still have quite a ways to go!! there is soooo much!! We got her crib all put together so now we just need the baby that goes with it :) Brielle got her first camo today! It is a pair of bibs! It is sooooooo cute!! daddy was all smiles!!! Its a joke at the hospital that she needs to come home in camo since her due date is technically opening weekend of bow hunting! Its coming quick!!

I forgot to add yesterday, We had lots of balloons at my familys shower and we didnt know what to do with them, so we each took on and released them up to Ayden on Anthonys "Here you go Ayden" command. It was cute! Brought tears to Josh and my eyes.

Brielles lung Xray today showed she is still mildly collapsed and not getting any better, but not any worse. Dr Abe was talking about switching her diaretics to see if he could get some of the fluid off her lungs and get her weaned off her vent settings. We dont want to rush her because that could send her backwards. Its soooo tough because we want her to be that 5 steps ahead of where she is. But like every nurse says to us, she shouldnt be here yet. So its okay where she is. We shouldnt have her right now. So she is doing very well considering her circumstances. She is having to fight for the place she is at right now instead of me pulling all the weight for her. So we have to keep telling ourselves that as well. It is hard!! We see her, she is here! Doing pretty good! Of course we want her to be home already. Who wouldnt? But September is just around the corner. We made is 68 days already we can make it another 42 days til her due date. And maybe she will surprise us and make it home before that :)

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Baby Shower #1

Brielles first baby shower with my family was this afternoon! Brielle is one spoiled girl!! She has sooo much love and support we are so thankful for!!! It was pretty cute, when we got up there after her shower, I was telling her a bunch of stuff that she got! I said "you got a camo blanket with PINK" and she smiled and smushed her face! It was soo cute! Like she knew what I was saying and reacting in a way like she liked it!! We have Joshs family tomorrow! Her room is filling up!! My dad said we might need 2 rooms to put all her stuff in :)

Brielle is still at 3lbs 10 oz. But thats okay! She had a blow out poop last night for Terri! So she stayed about the same! Nurse Terri put a cute little bow in her hair last night! Josh went to the hospital before me this morning and sent me a picture to my email of her with the bow in her hair! It was pretty cute! nice email to wake up too! When she is about 4 1/2 pounds they will be transfering her to a crib since she is in the lowest settings possible on her isolette. I asked Terri if we could bring her mobile in and she said absolutely!! I think it will bring a sense of "home" with her when she comes home even. Thanks for the idea Sara!!! We got Brielles carseat today too from my mom, dad, dads gf Mary, stepdad Rob, Grandma Kathy, my sister Emily, and brother in law Mike! They also bought her mobile. Now I cant wait til I get to hear the words I hear the nurses tell so many other families, "You can bring in the carseat any day now!!"

Thursday, August 5, 2010

2nd ROP appt.

Brielle had her second eye screening for ROP (retinopothy of prematurity). She is now at Zone 1 stage 2. When they get to stage 3 she will have the laser surgery. There is no knowing when or if that could be. Next Thursdayish when she has her 7-10 day followup appt they will either stay where they are now, get worse, or correct themselves. Both Drs said that it doesnt surprise them that she has some sort of ROP. With her being 24 weeks 2 days when she was born and then being on the amount of oxygen she is on, its not shocking. So only time will tell what she does! I found this webpage that explained the condition pretty well I thought if you'd like more info. Its difficult to explain!


Our little Angel is now 3lbs 9 oz! Not bad! she has gained 9oz in a week! She will be 4lbs before we even know it!! Mommy hasnt been doing her job and was behind on laundry, so she was put into a newborn outfit I had up there that was long but skinny enough to fit her! She didnt look to small in it! Hard to believe that she can almost fit in her preemie clothes already! They are poking her little heels tomorrow moring to check a blood gas and see what her CO2 level is at to see if they can wean her settings on her vapo therm at all. Lets hope we can!! The lower those settings are, the closer to bottle feedings, and closer to coming home!