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Sunday, August 1, 2010

2 Months Old

BRIELLE IS 2 MONTHS!! And 33 weeks gestation. I cant believe we have been in the NICU for 61 days! Brielle has sure overcame alot of obsticals that we are all so proud of her for! She has pneumonia that made her one sick baby! The first time I ever thought she might not pull thru. But after an emotional week she fought thru it! Facing possible PDA surgery. But it is closing slowly. Collapsed lungs and fluid on her lungs kept her on the vent longer than anticipated and another spell of penumonia. But now she is 3lbs and on the Vapotherm and doing awesome! Mommy and daddy get to give her baths by theirselves now and we take her in and out alone! It is great to have the independence. We are starting to feel more like parents without custody of our child. lol Just kidding!

Brielle got new neighbors. Twins. Boy and girl to make it worse. It doesnt sit very well with me. Some days I dread going. As selfish as that sounds. We are still grieving Ayden and it is hard to walk in the NICU and see the 2 incubators next to each other and say that should be how our room looks. I should have 2 precious babies. I am thankful for the one that I have dont get me wrong! But my perfectly planned pregnancy was by far not perfect! Our want to be parents and our journey as parents has been harder than most. Our little girl makes it so worth it tho! I have an amazing husband that stands by myside, puts me in my place, and helps me understand that my emotions are real and OK to feel that way. He is my rock. And honestly if it wasnt for having such a great, supportive, loving husband I probably would be a mess! Having a very fiesty sassy little girl is definately a plus as well! We will get thru all the tough times. Somedays I dont think its possible, but I am starting to tell myself we've come this far, I will make it thru this one as well!

5 comments:

  1. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRIELLE!!! You have come so far in the past 2 months! You have made everyone sooo proud! Truly a miracle baby! The power of prayer is an amazing thing! And you certainly had a ton of family, freinds and people that have never met you or your parents praying for all of you! You are a tough little girl and your parents are so amazing and tough as well. We had a couple scarey days along the way but you sure proved to everyone that you were strong enough to take on whatever came your way. I know it must be really hard to see another set of twins in her room...Ayden has done so much to watch and protect his sister as her angel...can't ask for a much closer angel than your own twin brother! When I held her the other day I sorta know how you feel, I too was selfish since Memory which is a lonnnggggg time ago, but I honestly could not get myself to hold a baby girl, no matter whose it was. I
    would shy away because it hurt so much. But in time one heals. Ayden will never be forgotten and we have so much to thank him for! Ayden we Love you and miss you! Thanks to Ayden and everyones prayers we are one more day closer to bringing her home!!! Love you guys!

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  2. Josh and Amber You three have come a long long way and hopefully the very worst is over. Looking forward to the day Brielle can be carried into her own home with you two is what you have to focus on. You and Josh have had a ton to carry on your shoulders and you should be VERY PROUD of yourselves-know we all are proud of you. Keep the good thoughts and stay strong. Take good care Love Debbie P.S. Love all the new pictures of Brielle she truly is looking great. What a love!!

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  3. Amber - WOW .. hard to think Bri is 3 months old. Seems like yesterday we were all laying around on bedrest chatting it up. .. It is always so refreshing to hear how well she is fighting though everything.

    I totally feel like the parent with out custody .. as odd as it sounds it feels like a good way to explain the feeling ..

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  4. Love all the new pictures!! Seeing her tiny figures (hand) that can't even cover up an adult finger nail...wow....it's amazing. And! All that hair! It's such a pretty color--what a little beauty. Can't wait to meet her. Hang in there Josh & Amber--you two are just as amazing as Brielle. You'll be home pushing her on a swing in no time! xxx

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  5. Happy 2nd month birthday Bri! As you grow bigger it will be hard for mom and dad to believe how small you were, until they look back at pictures. You have done so much in your life already. The things you have over come just shows what kind of person you will become. You have also helped your parents create an even stronger relationship- wow you are powerful. I want you to know that your parents have and will always be by your side; so dont be afraid to reach for the stars because they will catch you if you happen to fall. You have inspired so many people including me. It is amazing how the little people in our lives can have such a BIG impact on us. Keep up the good work and enjoy those spa days with Mom & Dad. I look forward to seeing you again soon.

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